Dec 26, 2012

One Piece of Advice I Never Got

When you're engaged marriage people crawl out from under their rocks just to give you the best advice they were ever given. Let me tell you, most of it sucks. They insist on giving it to you anyway.

Fast Forward.

Holidays are busy. There is no way around that. From Thanksgiving all the way until January all weekends are generally full of holiday related functions. At least that's how it is in my life!

For some reason this year I got slammed with all of my extended family Christmases in one weekend. Normally my mom's side has Christmas the first weekend in December. My dad's side gets together the last weekend before Christmas. Because of misunderstandings and conflicts both families decided to have Christmas this past weekend. This would have been overload enough for me but that's not all! 

Being as this is my first married Christmas M and I wanted to make a real effort to get to his extended family's Christmas. He doesn't have many cousins so he only has one extended family Christmas which was usually done around Thanksgiving. This is the first year it hasn't been so we decided we would go no matter what.

His cousin is in hockey and has a very busy schedule so only one weekend worked for them. We agreed only to realize that was the weekend both of the other get togethers were.


So we missed one Christmas. Drove 3 hours to the next Christmas. Drove 2 more hours to the next one.

The one piece of advice I have never been given is how to deal with spending equal time with both sides of your family. It is seriously hard! I love spending time with my family and I'm pretty stubborn about giving up time with them.

I know marriage is about compromise but is there any way to make this easier? I lost two family members on my dad's side in the last two years so missing that get together was not easy. Tears were shed. I know that it's something I'm just going to have to get used to but sharing holidays is never something I've had to deal with before.

Married friends, how do you deal with splitting your time?

xoxo, Mandy


  1. It is so hard! My husband has a small family and we skipped seeing them for Thanksgiving, so we absolutely made a point to be there. But it also happened to be our first Christmas where my sister couldn't come to town from Colorado, so my Mom was super upset. We ended up staying with my Mom on Christmas Eve, getting to my husband's family mid-day, but didn't get to see my Dad. It broke my heart, and I don't even want to think about his heart being broken. I wish we all just lived closer so it would be easy to see everyone.

    Merry Christmas!!!

  2. I'm not exactly married yet, but we've been together for 6 years and have two girls, so I do know what sharing holidays is like and Honestly this was the easiest year we've had due to his dad being out of town for the holidays. Hang in there girl, it's hard to please everyone!


Tell me how you really feel! I love to hear from you so don't be afraid to give me an ear full, thanks for stopping by!